Tuesday

Wow, has it already been almost a week since the last time I wrote? I need to stay focused and on track!

Thursday, I ended up meeting a nutricianist/trainer and let her know some of the issues i have with my body. So, I started a new diet and workout regimen. I am only supposed to eat meat, eggs, veggies and nuts. I started the diet on Saturday, and I was told I wasn't eating enough fat (which makes me a tad nervous) and that i have to add bacon to my breakfast and fish oil to both breakfast and dinner.

Thursday, in general, was pretty shitty. I was supposed to have a dinner with a friend and last minute he said he couldn't make it. I still went anyway and just drank and eat fried food. This ended up having a working waitress sit with me, which helped me out a lot. She got me into a different mindset and we exchanged numbers to continue to stay in touch. It could be my first girl friend while i transition! yay!

My workouts have changed as well. I am going to be doing tabata squats 4 times a week to help shape my butt and thighs. I know from them, my entire upper legs, including my butt is soo sore! Even sitting down doesn't help caues my butt hurts, lol.

On saturday, I went to ren faire and on my way up, i started thinking if i catch my friends by themselves, i'll tell them i'm a transsexual. So, ended up, that did happen and they knew i was hiding something, since i was always quiet about my personal life. One seemed genuinely happy and wants to meet Sonia, the other seemed glad but was kinda uncomfortable. I think if i seem to be more peronable than i used to be, they will come to like who i will become.

Still working on my voice. It seems like it is getting more "real" but I still think it sounds like a guy trying to sound as a girl. I'm glad i have a lot of time to work on it, and that i started so soon.

i still don't see much physical change of my body other than my breasts. My about 1/4 skin around the aorela seems to be expanding past my chest in a conical shape. That is pretty cool to see, and can't wait to see what i'll be like with actual breasts!

Friday, i went to my psychiatrist and i went up again to the maximum dosage of my anti-depressants. At first, i was very wishy-washy if i liked what the meds were doing to me. Now i am sort of happy for them because they let me focus on things other than extremely negative thoughts.